One day to go, now is not the time for self-doubt boys, now is not the time to be ringing me and in your best eight year old schoolboy voice whimper “cough, cough, I think I’m poorly, I’m going to stay in bed for a bit”.
Nay, nay and thrice nay, today is the day to list your life achievements to date, review them, ponder on what is missing, that perplexing ever present nag in your brain, the quiet voice that comes at night to ask “What are you doing with your life” and keeps you awake all night with its incessant questioning of your purpose on this earth.
Here is the answer boys, tomorrow we will fulfill our destiny, for it is written that on the morrow, this 17th day of July in the year of our Lord two thousand and nine, we shall journey henceforth to a place in the North where the wretch’s will point at our bicycles and ask in incredulous voices where its four legs are, and hurrying from that place we will set forth on the greatest adventure of our lives, carrying forth the banner/bicycle (delete as applicable) of our dear departed brother we shall forge through wilderness, through magical mysterious plains of wizardry and witchdom, we shall venture to places that appear on no map of these British Isles, probably because we are lost, but mainly because , because, because – its there.
This is what we have been building to these past 52 years boys, this is the main event, stand strong, gird your loins for your loins will be chafed as they have never been chafed before, breath deep of the Lakeland air, pump those pedals with a fervour born of righteous zeal and remember, there is cake at the end of the journey, there has to be cake.
Do not falter my blood companions, do not lose sight of the goal, never give up on the dream, for with a following wind, warm rain and kindly thorns avoiding our tyres then surely Sunderland will be ours, we can do this boys, I promise to you now, we can do this boys…
Cry God for Harry, England and St George – Huzzah !
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What do you think of my departure speech eh ?
Inspired by Kenneth Brannagh, I think it will work don’t you ?
On the other hand I might just say something like, “Fuck it lads, there must be a pub around here somewhere”
Good luck guys.
I have had fun following the lead up to this Epic journey and look forward to the videos and the follow up! Here’s to plenty of Cake!
Thank you – but you have to check here tomorrow morning, there is a very special departure video to watch, I insist you watch it, it is very appropriate.
Huzzah! HUZZAH!!! I wipe the tears from mine eyes!
Mixed feelings about the choice of vid. Olivier was much better, but then he didnt have Brian Blessed, the greatest of great Britons. Good luck for the next week, Hope the girls will be waiting at the end with a wheelchair for you.