…in which I do not name a famous footballer

Has there ever been a more pointless use of the law than the series of super-injunctions that famous sex maniacs have recently paid upwards of £50,000 to achieve ?

You know, those injunctions that only apply under English law so that every media site all over the world apart from English ones can name the individuals, those individuals who can now apparently be named in Scotland but not in England and those individuals who can be named in the debating chamber of the House of Lords but not outside in the lobby area ?

Do I look like I give a damn about who is the current over-paid, over-sexed footballer who has to date spent a small fortune (ie one weeks wage) trying to enforce his not-very-enforceable super-injunction to prevent English news media from using his name when they discuss how he shagged some bint off TV’s “Big Brother” ?

I only give a damn when his lawyers start threatening Twitter with legal action because lots of its users have named the footballer, the fact that Twitter isn’t subject to English law seems to have escaped their attention so we all sit back and wait for them to go back to the footballer and ask for another weeks wage off him to take up the action in the California court, given how succesful they have been in enforcing the law in the United Kingdom outside of England then you’d be forgiven for expecting the famous footballer to say “The money fountain is switched off now” but being a famous footballer he’ll probably just write the cheque in the hope that his reputation might be protected further if he sues everyone who has ever Twittered his name.

“What reputation ?” you may ask, the reputation for being a famous footballer with more money than you know what to do with, the reputation of having a team of very wealthy lawyers who are always ready to extract more money out of you for pointless unenforceable legal actions, and the reputation for having banged a tart who couldn’t wait to tell the newspapers until you took out what you thought was a water-tight injunction.

A fool and his money should keep his dick in his trousers and let his wife look after the cheque book, so goes the old saying.


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